What’s My Exit Strategy?

{ Dear Cookbook, I was unemployed for so long that I took the first job that came along. Now, after only two weeks I’m second guessing my decision. What should I do? Thank you, Nancy }

Nancy, tell me if I’m wrong here, but I’m guessing your story went something like this? After many months of unemployment and a severe lifestyle change, you finally landed a new job! You did the customary ‘victory dance’ and gave your new-found opportunity a good shot. But after two short weeks, you are beginning to realize that the ‘suckage’ just doesn’t end at the new workplace!

In fact, you’re probably realizing just how desperate you actually were and feel like you just can’t further degrade yourself at the new workplace any longer. Odds are when that realization hit you, you thought; “This place is lame, what’s my exit strategy?”

Have I been right so far Nancy? Yeah, I thought so. The fact is, you now have three exit strategies available to you. Which one you end up choosing, is up to you.

Strategy #1: Stick it out. Let’s face it, no matter how bad it is, it can’t be worse than unemployment. The boss may be considered a ‘heinous humanoid’ and your coworkers may be nothing more than warm bodies filling up space, but you still believe that with a little perseverance, you can get through it. So what if the stress makes you take up drinking again? At least now you can afford the booze!

Strategy #2: Find something better. ROFL! Yeah and while you’re at it, keep wishing on shooting stars and looking for that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Why? Because you’ve lost all touch with reality my friend! Newsflash kiddo, you’re already working on something better — something better than unemployment that is!

Strategy #3: Stand on top of your soapbox. If you just can’t stick it out and you haven’t found that magical pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, then consider an exit with style! Pick a surface that is elevated by at least two feet, then step onto it. Proceed to tell your boss and your coworkers exactly how you feel. Let them know that you’ve worked with infants that are smarter than they are. You might even mention that if tomorrow was ‘bring your dog to work day’, actual work might be accomplished thanks to the influence of some canine-coordinated backup!

What's my exit strategy?

Are you thinking about using some of this advice at your workplace? Before you do, let’s take a gander at Jobless Johnny and Hireable Hank’s results:

Jobless Johnny used his desk as a soapbox and then proceeded to tell the entire office what he thought of them. After a fifteen minute tirade about his bosses lack of managerial skills and thinning hairline, he was violently escorted from the building and literally thrown to the curb.

Hireable Hank doesn’t like the idea of being unemployed again, so he’s handling things with more responsibility. He’s got his ‘feelers out’ and is currently looking for a better job. He’s not going to jump ship though, until he’s got something else lined up first.

 

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